5 October, 2012 mcfadyena


Driving the hour and a half to school this morning, I put my iPod on random and just let my music play whatever it wanted.  It was lovely being surprised about what song was coming on next and made for a relaxing trip on a dreary Friday morning in Ontario.  A lot of what came on was upbeat and fun and I enjoyed my journey.  The last song that came on before I arrived in Kingston wasn’t a song at all – it was the sound of my own voice calling out from the speakers and announcing that I had Isaac and Gabriel with me for a bit of fun with the microphone.

My face immediately lit up – I’d forgotten that we used to play around recording ourselves when the boys were little.  Listening to them made my morning – my week, really – and took a bit of the stress I’ve been feeling lately down a few levels.

2012 has been a hard year for us and I feel like we’ve been treading water, just trying to stay above the surface long enough to survive.  Isaac’s health challenges have taken a lot out of us, fighting for Violet was exhausting, and the unknowns that are left with Project One Million is both stressful and Hopeful at the same time.  And just when I’ve been feeling like the tank was running on empty, the voices of my beautiful boys came singing through the speakers in my car.

Our Gala takes place in a week – and our teleconference with Johnson and Johnson takes place 2 days before.  We’ve been struggling to get there – weighed down by everything that’s on our plate.  Incredibly stressful doesn’t begin to describe the process involved with Project One Million – we think about it every moment of every day.  What happens if we don’t succeed?  What happens if we do?  Listening to my boys this morning gave me that moment of clarity I’ve needed going into this final stretch.  This is exactly what Project One Million is all about – giving my son the shot at life he deserves, and giving everyone else suffering from this disease that same chance.

Isaac singing into that microphone this morning showed how innocent, how loving, how truly incredible he really is.  He’s a little boy fighting a battle that we can’t imagine, and we have to help him win it – whatever the cost.

As we head into our Thanksgiving weekend, I’m reminded how truly thankful I am to have Isaac and Gabriel, and my lovely wife Ellen, in my life.  I didn’t really need to hear that recording this morning to remind me, but it was nice to have those voices nudge things back in order for me.  Stress?  We can do this.  Johnson and Johnson next week?  We can make it happen.  And our Gala?  It will be a celebration worth remembering, to be sure!

Project One Million keeps going.  For Isaac.  For Jasper.  For Violet.  For Trey and Case and Justin. For all of those kids out there suffering from this disease – we’re going to fight and win.

Enjoy listening to this gem I found this morning.  I hope it gives you as much pause as it did me, and I hope it gives you a moment to find some perspective in life.  Listen Here! – Gabriel and Isaac – November 19 2007

Happy Thanksgiving.

With Love,



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